The Not So Perfect Parent

This week I asked Pastor Wayne Hedlund to share with us on the subject of parenting. Pastor Wayne is the Executive Pastor here at EGC and has served in almost every position at the church. He is the father of four and has been a great mentor and coach to me as the Children's Pastor and in my personal life. 

“Brothers, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak thing of the world to shame the strong. He chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things – and the things that are not – to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before him. It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God – that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption. Therefore, as it is written: “Let him who boasts boast in the Lord.”  1 Corinthians 1:26-31

Guess what? It’s OK for you to not get everything right. This passage is a reminder to us that God is the one who works through our lives to our children, despite our weaknesses, ignorance, and failures. There is no point in placing the weight of all your accumulated mistakes on your shoulders to bare every day. This Scripture gives us the freedom to be lacking in wisdom, to do foolish things, and be the weak vessels that we are. It allows us room to make mistakes and still be parents. We have not become disqualified.

God chose you to be the parents of your children. You have no excuse. He knew you would be weak. He knew you would make mistakes. He knew your kids would grow up and one day remember your mistakes. He knew you wouldn’t always know what to do. He knew you’d blow your top sometimes, that you would occasionally be lazy, or inconsistent, or perhaps even negligent. Certainly you didn’t have it all together when that first child was laid into your arms; and you know you didn’t when the ones after that started following you around the house. But God still called you. He still specifically placed that child into your sphere of influence and responsibility.

Why? So that no one may boast before him. Christ Jesus is our righteousness, holiness and redemption. So when we are weak, all we can do is lean on and rely on Him. We can pray for and ask for His wisdom. In the end, our children are His children. By God’s grace, one day they will boast in what God has done for them much more than they will boast in what we have done for them. So love your kids with everything that’s in you; do your absolute best; read books; go to classes; and ask other parents and mentors what to do. But at the end of the day, let go of your guilt and shame and allow God’s grace to cover over your mistakes. Your kids are going to make it . . . after all, you made it, right?

Wayne